Sacrifice

Z and Beppe (his great-grandmother)

"But my life is worth nothing to me unless I use it for finishing the work assigned me by the Lord Jesus—the work of telling others the Good News about the wonderful grace of God." -Acts 20:24 NTL

    The past week was so great it was sad.

     My parent`s complex has a beautiful pool, which opened the week I was there.  Dad and I ran over there the day we arrived (just Z and I, Dave had to stay on Quadra and work), and discovered it was the loveliest salt-water pool I have ever been in.  I went swimming almost every day I was there, except the day my sister and I ran over there in the rain and it was closed.  Apparently someone thought that people shouldn`t swim in the rain at 9pm.  Crazy. 

   On one of the last evenings we were able to go early enough that Z came with us.  He really wanted to swim Gramps, so I handed him to my dad and they had a ball together (other than the "incident"... don`t worry, everyone lived through it... haha, Dad!).  I felt a little teary-eyed as I watched my dad play the same games with Z that he had played with me as a child.

     Z and I went to visit Dave`s family, and spent the afternoon playing at the park, clearing out the basement to make space for the stuff we`ll be leaving when we go to YWAM, and playing car with Auntie K.  Once again I felt a pang of sadness as I watched my son interact with his loving Aunt, thinking of all the fun they could have together if we lived nearer. 

     We visited both of my grandmothers.  One lives "on the way" to the mainland, and so we spent the night at her house before carrying on to my parent`s house.  We also took a trip across the border to visit my grandmother in the States.  She took us out for a nice lunch and to show us around her small town.  It was again a bittersweet feeling as we said goodbye.  I was so thankful to have been able to see her, but grieved at not living nearer so I could be more of a support to her.

    Z and I had so much fun with my family.  We swam, we watched Megamind, we ate gluten-free waffles, we "went" to the Mumford and Sons concert (it counts to watch it through the fence, right?), we had a lot of laughs, went for a skytrain adventure, and starting potty training!!! 

     My family is a wonderful family.  We are fun, and lively, and caring, and dedicated to one another, and humorous.  I once asked my mom if it`s hard for her that I have moved away, and taken her grandchild with me... what she said is both profound and deeply meaningful to me;

    "Yes, it is hard to be apart, but I always remind myself that I am privileged to have a child in the ministry.  I want you to follow Jesus more than I want to live near you," she said.  (Paraphrased, sorry Mom)

    Thank you, Mom (and Dad), for giving me the freedom to follow Christ wholeheartedly, as I believe we are doing.  As I pulled away from that curb yesterday morning, I could see the pain in your eyes, and I knew it was reflected in my own.  Living away from family is very difficult, but knowing that you support our ministry/life is the greatest encouragement to us.  You both build us up in our faith and in our desire to follow Christ.  This missionary life requires sacrifice from not only us, but you... thank you for putting us into the safe hands of Jesus and encouraging us to follow- regardless of the cost.

     I love you family... I love you so much it hurts my heart.  Thank you for being so wonderful.  



Note:  To all the family and friends we didn`t see, sorry we missed you.  Thank you to each of you for your love and support.  We are richly blessed by how many amazing people we have in our life.   

   
   
     
     

  
     

God`s Provision

Z playing in the pool

    "Our God is able to do exceedingly, abundantly, above all that we ask or imagine."
       - Ephesians 3:20

   God`s provision.  It`s been the theme the past few weeks, and I have been amazed and blessed by all the ways God has encouraged my heart.  Recently I encouraged a friend to ask God to provide for her in a specific way.  Not demanding from God, but asking our loving Father to show Himself to her in a tangible way for her situation.  After talking to her, I got to thinking about my own relationship with my Heavenly Father, and wondering if He would show me His love in a visible and tangible way too.  Then I began to look around, and I realized that my prayer was answered before it was spoken. 

Our house 

     God`s love is so real in my life.  I have unanswered prayers, and deep hurts that I carry... but I am not abandoned.  Not even close.  When I took the time to truly look for the gifts in my life, I could see how rich my life is.  Look at our house... it`s big and beautiful, and we have chickens and flowering plants, and lots of space for guests and big pancake dinners (have I mentioned my love of pancakes? haha).  We don`t pay rent.  Camp gives us the house to live in and call our own.  I even got to pick out the paint colours.  God has blessed us with a beautiful place to live. 

Z feeding his "baby" 

           


    My son.  No list of my blessings would be complete without another long description of how much I love that kid.  This week he has started speaking in full sentences, and has added some Spanish phrases, including "Adios Papa", "Te Amo Papa", and "Hola!".  (Bye Daddy, I love you Daddy, and Hi).  He makes me so proud every day to be his mama by how gentle and loving he is to everyone and what a friendly little guy he is to all the people we see on a daily basis.  His best buddy, O, got a "bike" this week too, so he`s adding riding the bike to his list of skills.  Thank you God for my little boy! 

Z and the chickens playing in the backyard 

     God has provided people to pray with.  We have been hosting a prayer meeting in our house for over a year now, and for a while it was kind of losing steam... some mornings it was just Dave and I.  But with all the new spring staff arriving we have gotten a bunch of new prayer teammates, and those three mornings a week have become a great encouragement.  We pray for each other, the ministry at camp, and missionaries around the world.  Prayer is so important, and to have other people who are dedicated to join with us in Spirit means the world to me.

Morning prayer  team (staged photo... I don`t take pictures while we pray) 

Dave and Jacob prepare for the week

      God has provided new friendships too.  Dave has been working with a new guy named Jacob all week (he`s spring staff, and from America!!!).  The two of them have been encouraging to each other in the Lord, have had lots of laughs, and made some great meals.  Jacob even helped Dave prepare a hand-made pasta night for the ladies retreat this weekend. 

    God has provided for every one of our emotional, physical, spiritual, and financial needs... then this last week I incurred a few medical expenses (dental work and needing new glasses).  We have savings that are intended for YWAM, and I figured that God could provide more for that account if I had to spend some money for these immediate needs.

    Then this afternoon, at lunch, the leader of ladies retreat presented Dave and I with an envelope containing a love offering from these sweet ladies.  (Black Creek Mennonite Brethren Church).  They said they had heard about what we were heading off to do, and wanted to help us out, as well as thank Dave for his delicious cooking.  Inside the envelope was a card and enough cash to cover all of my medical expenses- with some left over! 

     Our God is able to provide.  He has provided me with a husband and son whom I love dearly.  He has provided both Dave and I with good friends to encourage us.  He has provided us with a ministry team and the housing and resources to stay on the mission field.  And just now, He provided for my new glasses... in cash. 

    "My God is able to do exceedingly, abundantly, above all that we ask or imagine."  - Ephesians 3:20 

My Precious Gem Child

Z playing in his freshly organized play area

     Gliding through the water, I point to the seal that has popped his head out near our canoe.  Z doesn`t look in time, and the seal submerges under the deep green waters.  He is still concerned about the crab we saw crawling along the bottom while we were nearer to shore.
    "More crab, Mom?" he asks me.
    I tell him we can`t see the crabs because the water is too deep.
    We paddle along, stopping every once in a while so that our camp photographer, who is riding in the front of Z and I`s canoe, can take photos.  We are surrounded by about 10 ladies and their daughter in canoes, everyone laughing over the blond joke that Karyn just told (she is blond, so that makes it okay, right?)... and we are heading over
to see the ship-wrecked fishing boat on one of the islands near the camp.  My son leans back against me, from his little seat on the safety bucket.                           "Boats crash?" he says, obviously concerned. 

Z and his best buddy O

Sunday morning canoe trip

    I tell him that yes, the boats did crash, but then reassure him that our boat will not crash.  He immediately wants to know if the people are hurt.  At first I`m confused about what people he might be talking about, but then it dawns on me that he`s concerned about the people on the "crashed boats".  I assure him that no one was hurt on the boats, and he goes back to talking about the crab. 

Z and O playing in the "sandbox" (aka volleyball court)

    I am touched though, by the heart of my child.  He is such a kind boy, so concerned for the welfare of others.  I have always thought that he was a kind child, ever since he was little, but his character has been blossoming and becoming so beautiful these days.  He is such a sweet, funny, and caring little boy; he is my precious gem.

    I got that term from a book about birth order, and it refers to children who are the only child to parents who wanted more children.  For a long time I have loathed the term "only child".  Anytime someone calls him an only child I always want to scream, "he`s the oldest!  He just doesn`t have siblings yet!"... but most of the time I just smile and try to change the subject.  The fact that I can`t give Z a sibling is the greatest source of pain in my life, but this past week God has given me so much joy in my son, that my broken heart is soothed and comforted.

    Earlier this week we went for an overnight stay in Victoria, as Dave had some work to do there with the company that supplies our food.  The company put us up in a beautiful hotel, which even had a pool!  We had such a lovely time as a family, going to the petting zoo, meeting up with some friends for dinner, staying up late watching the food network, and going swimming.  We felt so bonded and happy to be spending time as a family in a completely relaxed environment.
   The next morning Dave went to his conference, and Z and I went swimming.  The sun shone through the windows over the pool, and as my son and I splashed around I felt an emotion that can only be described as bliss.  We were so happy together, and I felt overwhelmingly grateful to be his mommy.  He and I spent the whole day together, completely focused on enjoying each other`s company.

    Friday Z surprised us by telling both of us he loved us for the first time.  It was so special, and made me cry.  I have waited my entire life to hear the words, "I love you, Mommy."

    Yesterday Z and I had a fantastic morning going to the farmer`s market together.  We bought a cupcake and sat in the shade enjoying it together.  We spent the afternoon splashing around in our wading pool, with Z`s giggles making the sunshine even brighter.  Then, to top off a beautiful week, this morning we went on the canoe trip with the ladies and their daughters.

   At the beginning of this mother/daughter camp (that`s why we only had women on the canoe trip), I was feeling sorry for myself that I didn`t have a daughter.  But the more I thought about the wonderful week I`ve had with my son, I am grateful for what the Lord has given to me.  My son is kind, and silly, and super adorable... and he`s mine.  I prayed for three years, and the Lord brought him to me... maybe it`ll take three years of praying before the next one comes along... or maybe there will never be another one.  But I am so thankful that God saw my pain and gave me a precious gem.  I am so, so very thankful.