Bacon in the Rain

Okay, so here`s the deal.  I don`t like camping.  I like the IDEA of camping.  I like thinking that I am the sort of girl who is at home in nature... but let`s be real.  I am afraid of nature.  I like my warm, comfortable bed at night, in my house with the door to keep the critters out.  I blame my Dad for these feelings... he hates camping too. 

Now, just a bit of a back-story on me.  I should love camping.  My Greatest-Of-All-Time childhood memory is of the summer when my family lived at a campsite to save money.  Everyone at the church thought we were homeless and kept showing up to have hot-dog roasts with us.  We bathed in a Rubbermaid tote (could be where my love affair with totes came from), we rode bikes all day, we ate granola that my mom made by the bucket-full once a week at a church-friend`s house (they thought we were homeless too).  But anyhow, we saved a ton of money and had a BLAST!  I should LOVE LOVE LOVE camping.  But anyhow, to be fair, that was like, 19ish years ago, and maybe I`ve changed a bit. 

A very bad photo of our camper as a child.  I`m the kid in the middle on the right hand side.  

Then again, in my teens I went for three consecutive summers to Florida for two weeks for The Lord`s Boot Camp.  It was camping in the jungle, waking up early, running an obstacle course at 5am in the rain, working hard all day, and sleeping on a slat of wood every night... then going overseas for a month and doing more of the same as a missions trip.  I went three years because I loved it SO MUCH!!!!  (www.teenmissions.org for more information or to send your troubled teens into the jungle to get some character just like my parents did to me!)  Again... I should love camping. 

But even after this kind of a background... I was not prepared for Camp Homewood Outtrip.  First of all, I had never left Z overnight, and I wasn`t sure that I wanted to... but on Monday morning we had prayer group as usual and a few of the girls came.  We got talking after prayer about trusting God, and could we really rely on God to take care of the things we care about the most.  I of course was thinking of Z, and how if I`m really honest with myself, I don`t trust anyone to take care of him.  I don`t trust Dave, and when it really comes down to it, I don`t trust God. 

After we had talked about trusting God, the subject changed to plans for the Outtrip, and I realized that I needed to go.  Not because of any love I have for camping... but because I needed to give God a chance to show me that He can take care of Z without my help.  Plus, I have a huge fear of being outside at night, and I knew that I needed to trust God through that too... so I figured, "Okay, God, let`s do this.  I have got to learn to trust you to care for my family and for me in situations that scare me." 

trying to start a fire in the wind

Only three hours later, I was on the bus with my team of 7 other girls and we were off to Open Bay (it`s a secluded camping spot in the forest near a beautiful ocean bay, with a nice little river flowing past).  I felt more secure, knowing that at least if something happened in the night, that it was possible to come and find me, since Open Bay is only about an hour from camp.  It was the oddest feeling as our bus driver, Darryl, dropped us off and drove away at the trail head.  We would not be picked up till 11am the next day, and we had to "survive" till then. 

Yvonne took this photo of (left-right) Emma, Julie, Bella, Katie, Me, Kristin, and Melissa

First order of business was to set up a shelter to sleep in.  The clouds were threatening rain, and the ground was already damp, so we quickly pulled out our tarp and got to work.  Turns out we had no idea what we were doing... even though everyone had been very opinionated during the building process.  Our team was comprised of almost all first-born/only child females... haha... plenty of opinions about everything! 

Sleeping area.  My spot was the black sleeping bag under the peak of the tarp

We enjoyed the rest of the day once the tarp was up.  I went swimming with a couple friends, and then we gorged ourselves on the copious amounts of food my husband sent along with us.  We had a sing-along, discussed many topics with the fiery passion that only a first-born can bring to a conversation, and went to bed early.  The rain had held off, and we were all in good spirits as we "went to sleep". 

View of the campsite from the tarp

Except I didn`t go to sleep.  I just laid there.  I could hear everyone else sleeping, but I never drifted off.  My mom used to tell me that if you can`t sleep, maybe it`s because you need to pray for someone.  So I prayed.  I prayed for everyone I could think of, and then I made a deal with God that if  prayed for everyone else in the tent that I could go to sleep... but apparently he didn`t agree to the deal... because I stayed awake.  What struck me though, was the immense peace I felt.  I was basically alone in the dark, in the woods, under a tarp that barely even covered us.  Normally I would have been terrified... I mean, heck, I`m scared to go to our chicken coop in the dark and that`s IN our backyard!  I thought about Z, and instead of the usual bombardment of a million terrible things that might happen to him, I just had an image of him asleep in his warm bed (jealous!).

 I was at peace, and I knew that it was God who was keeping me from being afraid. 

At 2am it started raining for real, and pretty soon everyone was awake while our tarp flooded.  We all sat huddled together in the only dry-ish spot and leaned on each other since there wasn`t space to lay down anymore.  We sang songs (Justin Beiber!), and wondered what all the other teams were doing at their tent spots (7teams in all?)... and eventually got up at 5am, bundled in everything we could.  Then there was the desperate, but successful, attempt to get a fire started in the rain, which involved holding a towel over it to let it catch... and there was me, cooking bacon in a tiny pan, so tired and grumpy that everyone was making a wide circle around me.  (Melissa:  Good morning Shawn!  Me:  *glares at the bacon* I hate camping.)... yeah, sorry about that Melissa... but eventually the rain let up, we all ate enough carbs to spike our blood-sugar, and we played a game of "I Never", which is always good for a laugh.

Bella makes some perogies

Relief is the only word to describe how I felt when Darryl pulled up in the bus.  We piled on, and got to tell our horror stories to the other teams, who had had marginally better trips than us, so we could feel cool for having "suffered".

I really bonded with the girls on my team, and it is great to feel like "part of the group" this summer with the staff.  Heck, looking back, now that I`ve had some sleep, I would gladly go on outtrip again.  And I think more than anything else I realized that I can trust God to take care of me and my family.

"Be strong and courageous.  Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."  -Joshua 1:9

The toilet