the Dave and Shawn show: To My Forever Valentine

2006. I was going to Guatemala on a missions trip and my parents wanted me to find someone to fly with. I had written to the whole team of ten people and some guy named David had written to me. We started writing back and forth to each other, learning about how we both wanted to have large families, loved missions, God, and wanted to do big things for Jesus. After reading his third email I told my mom, "if this guy is good looking, I'm going to marry him." Unbeknownst to me, he was saying the same thing to his mom about me. We finally made plans to meet up and talk "flights". I told him to meet me at the Tim Hortons coffee shop across from my workplace.

The night of our first meeting, I got to the coffee shop first. Dave's best friend was coming to hang out too, since he also went to Guatemala on the same missions trip. The two of them came through the door, and I saw David for the first time. All I thought was, "That's my future husband."

Within three weeks we were talking about names for our future kids. I was madly in love with Dave from that very first meeting. 14 months after that day we were married with my father officiating the ceremony. I thought we would have a baby the next month, move overseas the month after that, and never, ever question if marrying each other was a good decision.

Fast forward seven years.

We are finally missionaries overseas. We finally are parents to one of the multiple children we long for. We have finally found healing and resoration for so much of the baggage we brought into our marriage (and when I say "we" I really just mean me). We have found a way to work together and to enjoy each other's friendship in both the good times and the bad. It has felt like a very long road.

Over the past years I have yelled at him, tried to convince him to leave me, and probably been meaner to him than I have been to any other person on the planet. And yet... He is still beside me. He knows the greatest mistakes I have ever made, and yet he forgives me and still loves me. He has laughed with me, rejoiced with me when we had victories, and he has wanted to be my husband every day of our marriage.

One of the days of our marriage we had faced another failed fertility treatment. I was crying in bed, and I didn't want to wake him up, so I went and cried on the couch in the living room. Suddenly I felt his arms around me and could feel that he was crying too. We probably cried for an hour, and then we went to bed and fell asleep in each other's arms. There was no need for words, only to be together in our grief.

Another day we were in the hospital, and I watched Dave holding our newborn baby son for the first time. He cuddled him so gently, and then, as if it was the only response he had for all the love in his heart, he began to pray over Z's life, blessing him and praying that God would use him in mighty ways. Words cannot express the joy I felt in that moment.

Another day we were at an orphanage, and I watched David sit with a group of seven kids, all of them sitting close to him, trying to see the pictures of the children's Bible he was reading to them. He loves kids, and he wants them to hear about Jesus. He reads the Bible every day to our son, and to all the other kids he works with. He is already a father to the fatherless, and we haven't even started adopting yet.

I do not deserve the man who calls me his wife. He is patient and servant-hearted, he is passionate about God and seeing lives transformed for Christ. He is compassionate to me, and loves me more than I could ever have imagined possible. He is my best friend and my true love.

When life got so hard I wanted to give up fighting for anything at all, much less our marriage, David never gave up. He is a true man of God, and I am forever grateful that he chose me.

Happy Seven Years of marriage, my love.